Thursday, March 29, 2012


Have you purchased your lottery ticket yet? 

If I won, the first thing I would do is pay off my student loans.  J's student loans.  I'd set up an endowment for GWS, so that budget issues could never affect the health and well-being of the program.  I'm sure we would get a bigger house, since 800 square feet, well... it's pretty small for all the life we put into the space.  Mama would get a new car.  Family members and loved ones would benefit and kids would have college funds set up.

I'm sure I would have a ton (or two!) more beads.  A wall o'beads.  Sigh.  

You know, all of the practical stuff would be taken care of, and then, I'd pursue some bigger dreams - travel, a holistic center, art classes, sources to empower women, to teach women's studies to a wider audience.

Which makes me think... why am I waiting for an unlikely lottery winning to begin to pursue more of these dreams?  Yes, right now, at this moment, my finances are limited.  But my resources aren't.  I know that the universe/Goddess/God/Higher Power/whatever you want to call it has a much greater understanding than I do of what is possible for me.  I mean really, I never NEVER expected to be starting a PhD program.  Never.  This is uncharted territory for me and I admit to being a bit freaked out.

Years ago, a friend told me to live like you have a million dollars in your pocket.  This allows you to take risks, pursue dreams, dream bigger dreams.  Wise words.  It's so easy to limit ourselves to what we think is possible.  When, really, there is so much more possible.

Time to live like I've won the lottery... because, in many ways, I have.

Although, it'd be really fun to...


  1. I also have a list of things I'd do if I won the lottery. I love the idea of doing some of them even though I'm penniless.

    I guess the thing about making Big Dreams conditional is that there will always be another condition to stand in our way. So it's better to just tackle them head on!

  2. Agreed. Overcoming my current financial challenges could be a good motivator for pursuing other dreams. Just can't get overwhelmed...