Friday, February 1, 2013

Bliss

Yes.  I find a great deal of my bliss in beads.  Sometimes, I think I enjoy sorting them as much as I do creating with them.

My recent trip to Quartzsite gave me lots of new treasures to sort.  (I'll share these in a later post.)  But, mostly, my trip helped me sort out my head.
Parker, AZ: mountains and the Colorado River
There's something about being with people that you love, that have known you and loved you forever, in a space that you love, that makes everything very real and crystal clear.

I lived in the desert for years.  Some years, I loved it.  Some, not so much.  The desert can be harsh when you don't have a lot of money or believe your opportunities are limited.  But the big blue sky and the mountains of the desert ALWAYS make me happy.  When in the desert, I have a clearer sense of who I am than I do anywhere else.

Maybe it's because I learned who I was, while living in the desert.
Mountains near Parker, AZ

And spending the week with Sally and Jim, with Jaynee, gave me a much needed reminder that the world is bigger than academia.  That my life was - once - focused on more.  Yes, I love teaching and learning, but I am also more than this.  And I have bigger dreams than meeting the expectations of professors and students and department/program chairs.  I have a much more creative and spiritual personality than academia allows.
Sick with a chest cold (again.  Will the effects of pneumonia never go away?), I sat on Sally and Jim's new front porch and looked at the horizon.  It's been awhile since I've done this, literally and figuratively.  And, I glimpsed a much simpler future than where I thought I was headed.  That big ole sky reminded me that my worries, while valid, can't be approached as insurmountable.  There really is something greater out there than I can imagine.  Greater, more powerful, more generous, more purposeful.  I can pick a direction, but then I need to get out of the way.

It's probably good that Jaynee is very pragmatic, or I would be in the process of chucking my life and heading to the desert. 

I'll get there.  It's just a matter of time and the big blue sky and the all-knowing mountains.



1 comment:

  1. I've always LOVED the beauty of the mountains and desert, but I don't think I'd be ever to live there. That doesn't mean I'm not in complete and utter awe by it's insurmountable beauty every time I see pictures though!

    Being an on-again-off-again student myself, I understand how school, regardless of if you're learning or if you're teaching, can take over your life.

    Sometimes it's a good thing to take a break from it all, especially in a gorgeous place gauging from those pictures ^.^

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